Is It Possible To Become A Born-again Virgin?

Hello friends, thanks for stopping by to read this blog.
Have you ever thought can I become a born-again virgin?
Well if you have there is good news. I came across an article that answered this very same question and I thought I would share it with you.

Keep the following in mind. 
God is not trying to keep sex away from you. He just wants YOU to experience something special and unique!!! .♥SRW

Is Born Again Virginity Possible?

"The Bible says that when we are born again, we are new creations, our old selves are dead and gone, and we have new life given to us by the Holy Spirit of God (2 Corinthians 5:17). This means that God chooses to no longer remember our past transgressions (Jeremiah 31:34), including losing virginity before marriage. Our sins are as far away from us as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12). There is absolutely no doubt that God will forgive sex before marriage. God’s love for a person is not diminished because of the mistakes that person has made.

However, though our sins are no longer counted against us, they are still very real and still carry with them earthly consequences. Once an act is done, it's done. It is, therefore, not possible to claim physical born-again virginity, just as it is not possible to reverse the consequences of any other sins we commit. What we can be done with, though, are the guilt feelings associated with having had premarital sex. This kind of guilt can cause us to doubt the power of God’s forgiveness because we can't forgive ourselves. We can be tyrannized by our emotions and feel we are too bad to be forgiven. There are several reasons for this. First, the conscience speaks against forgiveness. The only thing our conscience knows about is guilt and conviction. It knows nothing of grace and mercy. Second, Satan is the “accuser of the brethren” (Revelation 12:10), and he will do all he can to obscure the love and graciousness of God. But Satan is a liar and the father of lies (John 8:44). Once we recognize that it’s to his advantage to keep us incapacitated and immobilized by our guilt feelings, we can reject his lies, cling to the promises of Scripture, truly believe that we have died to sin, and begin to live for God in Christ (Romans 6:11).

Consider the apostle Paul—consumed with rage against Christ and “breathing out murderous threats against the Lord's disciples” (Acts 9:1), full of blasphemy and ungodliness, yet God forgave him and made Paul His chosen vessel to preach the Gospel to the whole world. Notice that God never required Paul to become a born-again anything other than a born-again believer in Jesus Christ. Paul goes on to tell us that although some of us were sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, homosexual offenders, thieves, greedy, drunkards, slanderers, and swindlers (1 Corinthians 6:9-12), yet through the infinite goodness and free grace of God, we are washed from the filth and guilt of our sins, justified by the righteousness of Christ, sanctified by the Spirit of Christ, and decked and adorned with the precious grace of Christ, holy and perfect in the sight of God. Knowing this, how can we possibly hold onto our guilty feelings?

Rather than seeking born-again virginity, a Christian who has made the mistake of sex before marriage should commit himself/herself to God and to abstaining from sexual intercourse until marriage. Claiming born-again virginity is not biblical. Believing wholeheartedly in God’s total forgiveness and making the choice to live righteously and in ways that are pleasing to Him—that is biblical."

Recommended Resource: Why True Love Waits by Josh McDowell.

Recommended Resource: Single, Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship by Tanika A. Chambers

Your Grace Is Enough

Try This Quiz - How Emotionally Available Are You?

Circle "T" or "F" to describe how you respond to the following situations. The more "True" answers you circle, the likelier you may have difficulty with emotional availability.

T	F	1. I seldom cry.
T	F	2. If I feel like crying, I try everything I can to stop myself.
T	F	3. I seldom saw my family express emotions when I was growing up.
T	F	4. Emotions are embarrassing.
T	F	5. There are many things from my childhood I don't like talking about.
T	F	6. I think people who express their emotions are weak or silly.
T	F	7. People who get emotional at work risk ruining things for all of us.
T	F	8. People do much better when they use logic, not emotions. Emotions are a waste of time.
T	F	9. If my friends want to talk about their relationships, I change the subject.
T	F	10. When I hear people talk about how they feel, I'm not sure what they mean.

(This quiz is adapted from Emotional Unavailability by Bryn C. Collins.)

Recommended Reading

Collins, Bryn C. Emotional Unavailability. Contemporary Books, ISBN: 0-8092-2914-5.

When God Wants To Encourage You He Knows Just How To Do It

As a new author it's normal to wonder how your book is doing out there? Are people  reading it?. and most importantly are people being impacted by it?  Well, this past Sunday I received the following e-mail, from my Aunt who lives in Florida, which blew my mind away.

"Hi Tanika, Its aunt Val once again ,touching base with you to let you know how proud I am of you, and also to share the good news i recieved from a stranger I met today in the supermarket about your book. She first asked where I attended church so I told her and she proceeded to tell me that her husband is an assistant pastor for a cribbean church here in Ft Lauderdale for 4 yrs and asked if i was married and would I be interested in visiting on a friday night singles night. She then told me she is reading this book Single Ready and Waiting , By Tanika Chambers and i should get it and that she cant get her head out of it . So I asked her where did she find it she said that she is a radio announcer and she was visiting Toranto and he friend gave it to her . I then told her ,She is my neice omg , I have to tell her Omg Omg. .Darling a sense of pride just over took me at that moment . May God bless you and continue lead to you .Keep up the good work." Aunt Valerie

Youtube Version

This book was written to encourage those who are single and ready to continue to trust God for a mate. If He is able to strategically place my aunt at a supermarket the same time as this woman who had my book He can strategically position you to meet your future spouse. 

BE ENCOURAGED!!! 

God Has A Master Plan With Your Name On It!! Get Your Copy Today and receive the NEW "10 SRW SIGNALS CARD," a reference guide to success.  Order here http://www.singlereadyandwaiting.com/order/

Ladies Beware - "17 Warning Signs of a Bad Boyfriend"

A married woman who said her husband now wanted a divorce passed along these tips to Dear Abby for the not-yet-married. 

"If your parents or siblings have doubts about him, pay attention. Listen and check it out.

If your intended has nothing good to say about his ex, beware. This is a pattern. Divorce is rarely only one person's fault.

If his children have nothing to do with him, do not believe him if he says his ex brainwashed them against him. My stepchildren have told me it was because they hated him, and they have good reasons.

Look closely at his credit and job history. They are sure predictors of what your life will be like.

If he's over 30 and has no money, do not let him move in with you, and don't marry him until he's financially solvent. If he has any respect for you (and himself), he'll insist on it.

Be sure in your heart that you can live with him AS IS. You cannot change another person.

This is a biggie: Beware if he has no friends. It is not true that they all chose to side with his ex.

If your friends dislike him, pay attention. This is also true if he hates your friends.

If he has more than one DUI and still drinks, run!

If he is one personality at work or with others and another person alone with you, run.

If he has nothing to do with his parents, investigate why. Don't take his word for it.

If he's an expert at everything and brags a lot, understand that he will turn off a lot of people, eventually maybe even you. 

Go with him to a doctor before you marry him. Believe me, his problem will become your problem.

If he is emotionally or verbally abusive, it will only get worse. Yelling, name-calling and glowering are classic signs of an abuser.

If he is never wrong and never apologizes, everything will be "your fault" forever. And after years of hearing it, you may even start to accept the blame.

If he does something wrong and says, "That wouldn't have happened if you hadn't (fill in the blank)," that's another sign of an abuser.

And if he's mean to children, pets, or animals, recognize that he's pathological, and the next victim could be you."

Wow after reading these 17 warning signs I knew that I had to share them. If you're a single man or a married man reading this post know that God loves you and wants you to be "Truly Single- Whole Without Holes" so that you can keep that woman. 

Change is never easy but it will be so worth it!  Ask God to make you over again, He will but this depends on how bad you want it!. 

And ladies in this month of new beginning you may have to accept the fact that the man you might be with is not the man for you, well not the way he is right now anyway. Something has to die to bring forth the new. Let him GO and if he's yours God will make him over again and present him to you again, READY.   

In the meantime, pray for  men everywhere that they will become the men of God they are to be: loving, caring, God-fearing, great providers etc..  Be your brothers keeper. 

The SRW book is not only reaching woman, men are reading it too. Listen to this candid e-mail I got today...hillarious.

 Life is hard enough..this is why it is so important that we get ourselves right.  Sometimes we need to swallow our pride and say God, it's me standing in the need of prayer..make me over again.

 

 Tanika A. Chambers

 

 

 

New Exerpt From The Book Single, Ready & Waiting

Are You Truly Single?

An Exerpt from the book Single, Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship

"If you want to have a successful courtship you must first look at what you bring to the road. Are you in the right condition to sit behind the courting wheel? Let’s find out. There is much more to being single than a person that is unattached. The SRW definition of being truly single is: whole without holes. 

What do I mean by whole without holes?

Have you ever placed loose change into your pocket, only to have them fall out because of a hole? Well, the same can be said about entering a courting relationship without first dealing with any unhealed wounds from your past. It can negatively affect your future relationship. So, to avoid this from happening you need to be whole without holes.

Being “whole without holes” means you have the inner assurance that you have been made “whole” through the finished work on the cross! You are at a place in your life where you are ready to receive, maintain and keep the blessings/person that God brings into your life. You would have forgiven yourself for any wrongdoing on your part. Also, you would have been healed emotionally, mentally and spiritually, from the actions of all those who may have hurt or disappointed you in the past.

Do you see yourself in this description?  Whether you do or not, this STOP will confirm what you already know and have done, or assist you in getting there."

"What can I say about your book; but well done. I am truly enjoying it.  I love the fact that you make it so real, with a sense of humour "pass me not oh gentle saviour" good one. Love the matter of fact advice and suggestions. Love the fact that you show scriptures for everything, so one can check for oneself. It is not a book that one rush to read, it is a book to learn from and practice some of the advice/ suggestions.  I made a lot of underlining. It makes one look at one self and ask the big question "Am I ready" I thought I was but after reading most of the book I am looking deeper within." CJ

Traits That Attract A Man To A Woman

Tango, Glo.com and Chemistry.com surveyed 20,000 people to determine the top 10 traits that attract a man to a woman and this is what they found.

"The official list of what initially attracts a man to a woman:
1.) Sexual chemistry
2.) Smile
3.) Kindness
4.) Sense of humor
5.) General body type
6.) Eyes
7.) Intelligence
8.) Communication skills
9.) Teeth/Lips
10.) Hair

What attracts a man to a woman in the long-term:
1.) Kindness
2.) Sense of humor
3.) Communication skills
4.) Sexual prowess
5.) Intelligence
6.) Smile
7.) Listening skills
8.) Money/Wealth
9.) General body type/fitness
10.) Eyes"

STOP, WAIT, GO Conclusion:
As you can see "sexual chemistry" is ranked #1 on the list for men before a committed relationship is formed then it is bumped down the list to #4.
What can men learn from this? Do not lose sight of what will matter most in the long run according to this list: Kindness, Sense of humour, Communication skills.

I also find it interesting that a womans hair may grab a mans attention in the beginning but in the long run it doesn't even make it on the list..or should I say on  the majority of mens list..lol.

At the end of the day we can see that what a man wants is not too different from what a woman may want in a long-term relationship (marriage). So while you're building friendships with the opposite sex (which is the best way to start any long-term relationship)  keep this list in mind.  Hope this was helpful:)



Tanika A. Chambers is the Founder & Author of Single, Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship. A must read book for single men & women. Book Reviews and Testimonials here: http://www.singlereadyandwaiting.com/order/book-reviews/

Part 1 - LIVE SINGLE, READY & WAITING BOOK LAUNCH TESTIMONIALS

SRW LAUNCH COMING TO THE 

WEST SIDE....(BRAMPTON)

THIS AUGUST....

STAY TUNED FOR MORE DETAILS

What Others Are Saying About the Single, Ready & Waiting Book

“The book launch was Amazing, it was a blessing to be in attendance!! So thank YOU !!! And the book is amazing!!! I love the openness and honesty with which it is written and it is very thorough, you cover so many issues that there is something in there for everyone. Especially loved those potholes, I know I found mine in there!! So Job well done and Congrats again!!” Tracy

“The Book Launch was awesome! I just want to say that your book is beginning to transform my life bit by bit. Well your going to laugh to what I am about to tell you, you’ve mentioned in your book the “stuff” your ex has given you well it’s so true, one day I found on Pic of myself and my ex that I held on to, and yes I do glance at it sometimes. I just couldn’t get over how good we looked together, and the gift he gave me, I keep it because it was practical, so with God’s strength I gave it up. He was the only relationship that I had and I punish myself for ending the relationship which was not holy. Looking back I realized that I am a working progress and that I am not “ready” which is very disappointing for me to admit because I am tired of being single and I’ve been single far to long. However, Thank you for sharing, as many women have not had the courage to tell about their struggles due to shame, so may God continue to bless your ministry as you go about empowering men and women of today.” AR

“This book has confirm to me that I’m on the right path (only by God’s grace) and as a single woman walking out the call of God in my life the key is to continue to wait and trust the greatest guide of all ( The Holy Spirit ) He will guide and lead us towards the “Sacred Stage of Courtship” (as described in the book) leading up to marriage. I encourage you to pick up a copy of Tanika’s new book “ Single Ready and Waiting your guide to courtship ” A must read for singles everywhere! ” Andria

“It was a great read and very practical. I can honestly say I enjoyed it!!” Valerie

“I just finished reading your book. Thank you! This is the BEST book on biblical singleness I’ve ever read. God bless you for this simple and very clear book.”  Barbara

“Hi Tanika I just want to say WOW…!!! I read your book in about three hours,went to bed and woke up this morning a new woman.I felt the Holy Spirit this morning and I am blown away at the healing that took place as I slept. I said the prayers suggested in the book and severed soul ties with people from my past. I have sooo much to say and share with you, but the most important thing is that this book MUST have it’s place in EVERY Church. It is anointed and filled with MUCH needed information and wisdom.OMG…!!!THANK YOU. I know that it was GOD’S heart for you to write this book, because I felt the anguish as a single person in my own spirit in regards to being single, ready and waiting. And my question to GOD was, is there ANY hope for those of us that want to do it your way this time? NO ONE is talking about, specifically…sexuality. I felt that even as a Christian attending Church, women were “screwed”(pardon the expression)… the reason was because, if we gave it up we were considered “loose” and if we held back we were considered “frigid”, both unattractive features in a mans mind and degrading in a womans. I felt hopeless and began to think we didn’t have a chance in hell, perhaps this was really a control conspiracy for the weak minded because EVERYONE was having sex anyway, even Christians, and if guys could get it for free, they were going for it. But it’s obvious that GOD heard the cries of countless women and maybe (one or two men, hahaha) with the birthing of your blessed book. Thank you once again.It is truly an answer to prayer for countless millions. You are a pioneer on the road to doing it the right way,which is (GOD’s way). Thank you for being the vessel through which GOD’s heart is poured out to those desperately seeking a mate.” Elizabeth

“Tanika Chambers, you are truly gifted and equipped for this mission to help restore order and clarity in the world of relationships. Continued success.” DB

“The book launch was Amazing, it was a blessing to be in attendance!! So thank YOU !!! And the book is amazing!!! I love the openness and honesty with which it is written and it is very thorough, you cover so many issues that there is something in there for everyone. Especially loved those potholes, I know I found mine in there!! So Job well done and Congrats again!!” Tracy 

Read More Testimonials and Reviews on the SRW webesite: http://www.singlereadyandwaiting.com/order/book-reviews/

Single Men Speak About Their Experience With Toronto Women

 
I was curious to know what single men and women think about Toronto men/women. So I asked the question; starting with the men. 


Please Note: These are the oppinions of 3 men and does not reflect the views of all men living in Toronto. The women they talk about does not also reflect all Ontario women.

I know these men personally and they are very sweet. If you are a Christian single woman (Between ages of (25-38)looking for a Christian, ambitious, caring loving man (they are both good looking too I might add) then  Send  your details to info@amillionmatches.com.

SRW : As a single man what has your experience been like with Toronto/Ontario women?


Man Speaks #1:

Boy, oh boy where do I begin when asked to talk about my experience with Toronto women. I could write a book but I'll try to keep it very short.

In my experience I have found that most ladies in Toronto want a man that who is financially stable, has a great car, a good job, a beautiful place to live, and is ready to get married right away. I don't blame these ladies, because I am not interested in dating a female who is on welfare but if a women is living in a bachelor apartment or at home and is unemployed but is ambitious and is driven to do something with herself I would be with her in a minute.

A lot of times when I meet a woman they think I'm cool and are excited to get to know me but once they hear that I live at home with my mother they usually go running really fast. Which makes me feel that I should not even approach a lady until I get some money in my pocket and move out, but then again there are the people who say it doesn't matter because if the person really likes you they'll make it work. However, I find it hard to make things work when your partner wants to go on vacation and you can't afford it, or they want to go to a cottage, expensive dinner etc.. and you just can't do it. I have friends who feel the same way. We know there is a minority of women who are financially stable, live in great homes, have great jobs and just want someone to respect them and be there to work with there partner and help him get to the next level but those type of ladies are hard to find and they are usually connected to the wrong person.

I do believe that Mrs. Right is out there but I am not going to waste my time looking her. I believe as long as I keep doing the things that I love to do  she will come when I least expect it.


Man Speaks #2:


My thoughts on Ontario woman

After living in ON for well over a century now I find I have developed several close 'friendships' with several ON ladies. There are a lot of seemingly nice, genuine ladies out here and most of these friendships I know will be long lasting ones. Relationship wise things have not run so smoothly. Since living out here I ultimately would say my take on dating Ontario woman has been quite disappointing. I've been in approx 8-9 'true' relationships since living here (of which for a guy like myself is quite high I might add) and only 1 went beyond a 2 month period of time.

I find ON woman picture themselves as very confident, direct & honest but in reality most of them are realistically confused, hurt and very distrusting (even unfaithful themselves). Most seem to have impenetrable walls up so high up that even eagles would have difficulty flying over them. Tones are materialistic, so much into how a guy looks that they will put up for a lot of the crap that stems from one, and then lump the rest of men into the same boat.

Lots will talk a lot about what they are looking for but once they find it they decide they don’t want it no more or that they want something different it’s almost like they are never satisfied no matter what or who it is. They want a manly man but at the same time see the need to dictate how this 'manly man' should be, what he should wear and how much money he should make etc.

I find most if not all ladies here are extremely selfish without even realizing it in most cases, getting a ladies attention is one thing but maintaining it is the other. To me relationships are about giving and taking so if both decide to get involved both parties should work hard at maintaining it. Once an Ontario lady is into you (attracted etc) they will do pretty much anything a guy asks but once that interest fades even the slightest bit it’s like you don’t even exist to them no more.

At the end of the day I find a lot of ladies are talking the talk but not walking the walk, wherein they be seeking something long term, true & lasting, but not willing to put in the work or even making sacrifices if need be. They say ladies (particularly single black ladies) out-number the single men and you would think as a result a lot of us men would have a field day with all the choices out there but instead I find the ladies are the ones controlling whom they will 'allow' to step to them (approach them).

I mean I am in no ways perfect and would never claim to be but after dating several ladies ending up with almost identical outcomes it’s almost like to be happy out here I moreso would be better off ‘settling’ with one of the ladies that I am not even interested in or attracted to.

Men Speak #3:

A man can get a Toronto woman. However to do so, the number of tests you have to pass involve financial success (or potential) and where you meet them (passing a social test). I just feel that Toronto women are generally very judgmental financially and it doesn't matter what a woman looks like. And those men you do see with women, are either well off financially, potentially well off or have played a large numbers' game. As for women out of one's league, I find that most women in Toronto feel that men are out of their league. Its an attitude. A man can ignore it, but it is there. And I also see a lot of single men and women out there.

How Can A Young Man/Woman Remain Pure

I am sharing this blog because many single Christians are struggling in silence with purity. For this reason I felt the need to share some helpful information. 

When we live in a world like ours how can a young man/woman (or older man or older woman) possibly expect to keep his way pure and to cleanse his life? What hope is there?  How can he/she cure himself of the problems of our age? How can he/she prevent getting taken into this sensuality, the flesh of this age that is wreaking havoc - not only around in our world, but today is wreaking havoc in the church of Jesus Christ?

Spiritual & Practicle Things You Can Do To Remain Pure

1. Read the word of God
2. Heed the word of God
3. Hide the word of God.

Psalm 119 and verse 9: "Wherewithal shall a young man cleanse his way?" - or how can a young man keep his way pure? - "By taking heed thereto according to thy word. With my whole heart have I sought thee: O let me not wander from thy commandments. Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee. Blessed art thou, O Lord: teach me thy statutes. With my lips have I declared all the judgments of thy mouth. I have rejoiced in the way of thy testimonies, as much as in all riches. I will meditate in thy precepts, and have respect unto thy ways. I will delight myself in thy statutes: I will not forget thy word".

Like David after my "relationship collision" I hid God's word in my heart so I would not sin against Him again. God is definetly a keeper!.




Scriptures to meditate on to bring about a change in behaviour

Psalm 119 - meditate upon the entire chapter


2 Corinthians 10:5 "Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;"

1 Corinthians 6:20 " For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's."

Philippians 4:13 - "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

Revelations 12: 11 "And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death."



God Can Deliver!! A TESTIMONY OF AN EX-MASTURBATOR

Is Masturbation A Sin

Practicle Things You Can Do To Stop Masturbating:

1. Isolate the cause. There is a reason or reasons you masturbate excessively, and you must find out why. If you concentrate on just stopping masturbation then you will just return to your addiction after a short period of success. So, why do you masturbate? It could be because you are bored, lonely, hurt, stressed, sexually frustrated or it could be because of pains from the past. You're going to have to get yourself in a relaxed state conducive to productive thought to really find out why you turn to masturbation. What are you trying to escape? Avoid focusing on symptoms. Saying you masturbate because it feels good is not the real reason you masturbate excessively. Dig deep into your feelings. If you find this part difficult you may need therapy to help you discover feelings you are not seeing clearly right now.
2. Deal with your feelings. Dealing with feelings correctly is a skill and may be a skill you have forgotten or need to learn. Feelings are the result of thoughts. How we interpret the world and ourselves in our minds determines how we feel. We decide how we feel about things. If you masturbate because you feel bored then it is because you decided to feel bored. Nobody made you feel bored. You did.
3. Change the thought patterns that are leading to excessive masturbation. You can no longer see masturbation as a solution to your boredom or loneliness. The more you learn to enjoy your everyday life the less you will want to turn to masturbation.
4. Narrow down the times of the day that seem to be the biggest problem for you. Isolating the times of the day that you struggle the most can help you to focus your efforts better to overcome masturbation addiction. If you know you struggle most when you lay down at night then you can create a plan specific to that time of day, for example do not lay down. Maybe you need to exercise and burn some testosterone or oestrogen before going to bed. Exercise will also help you to be more tired and fall asleep faster. If you struggle at different times of the day or several times throughout the day then try to narrow down the times and the environment you're in when this becomes difficult.
5. Spend some time each day, perhaps in the morning, visualizing a new you. A more confident, sociable, outgoing you. It's important that you start reprogramming your brain on a daily basis. It may seem awkward at first but if you persist, you will become more comfortable with your new self-image.
6. Change your habits. You cannot overcome a masturbation addiction so long as you are spending a lot of time alone in your bedroom viewing pornography. Get out and meet people. Form healthy relationships and perhaps find another outlet for your sexual energy.
7. Have an emergency way out - When the wave of temptation comes you need to have a pre-planned emergency way out. Many people have found that snapping a rubber band on their wrist helps break the automatic thought chain that leads to masturbation. Of course you don't want to hurt yourself, just have something similar to get your mind off masturbating.
8. Have a snack . Eating can help your body and mind to change your patterns. This is not a time to worry excessively about gaining weight. (If so, then maybe a little more exercise.)  

MORE TIPS

• If you have the tendency to masturbate at night, in bed, do some sit ups or other exercise before you get into bed so you burn some of your extra energy.
• Never give up hope, you can and will overcome the addiction even if you need help.
• It is all in your brain, you can always replace your thoughts with wholesome ones if you really want to. You have the power to stop it.
• If you have the tendency to masturbate looking at porn on computers, try moving your computer into a room where others can see you.
• Consider installing porn-blocking software on your computer. Of course you will know the password to bypass the blocking function, but just having it pop up will give you a chance to reconsider and move to another activity instead of masturbating.
• One thing that works with the software is having a trustworthy and understanding friend set the password for you, so that you never know what it is. This way, the software will block your computer from being able to access porn, but you will not be able to deactivate it.
• If you have a problem in bed, keep mints or candy next to your bed. Sometimes eating a snack or a small piece helps. When your mouth produces more saliva it brings on seratonin, and that brings on a release of sense of well being and comfort. You can choose sugar-free so you don't worry about dental woes.
• If your thoughts happen in the shower, whistle, or if you can sing, then sing. Keep your mind doing other things. Touch yourself as little as possible - just enough to get clean - especially if you are not circumcised. Clean yourself, but touch as little as possible
• Don't think that you are addicted to Masturbation. I say to you today - "You're not". Don't think low of yourself. Always remember that everything is under your control and not you under their control.

Above taken from : http://www.wikihow.com/Stop-a-Masturbation-Addiction

"Living Solo" for 2 Weeks Without Hubby

They say...."Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder"

 When the nations call you gotta go!

On April 29th, I dropped Robert off at the Toronto, Pearson Airport. We kissed, waved goodbye and went our seperate ways. When I got into the car I realized I was missing one thing: the keys. Yikes..I quickly jumped out of the car and ran as fast as I could to catch up to him. "Robert" I shouted, about 10 men looked at me..lololol. Thank-fully he saw me and walked back. Phew..that was close. With the excitement of going away he thought he had left the keys in the car. Just another opportuntiy to exchange our warm goodbyes. Off to Zimbabwe he went.


Week 1

Because I am a woman that lives life on purpose, I was definetly not at home twiddling my thumbs wondering what to do with myself. In fact, times like these remind me about the importance of having a life outside of my marriage. Though we are one, God has given me a community of friends and family that I can spend quality time with.

Week 2 

It was only a matter of time before Robert and I communicated through ComF5. (Which is a great tool for e-marketing by the way). 

HEADS UP L&M and SRW : No matter how far away you might be from your spouse, make the effort to  stay connected. 

Thanks to a feature called LiveF5 (similar to Skype) on the ComF5 system, we were able to schedule Talk Dates. It was great. We shared how our week went and got a prayer in too. 

Week 3 - Thank God there isn't a week three...LOLOL

SUNDAY - ROBERT GET"S PICKED UP

After giving him a warm welcome. These are the first two things I'm going to say:

1. Robert, your turn to do the dishes..lol
2. And I won't wear my satin head tie tonight....but just for tonight..lololol.:)




Tanika A. Chambers

Love Is A Wonderful Thing When You're Truly Ready For It

Love is a wonderful thing and we all desire to meet that one person we want to spend the rest of our life with. But what if you're not really Single, Ready or willing to Wait for it? Then what? 

In order to develop a strong marriage that will stand the test of time there is a level of preparedness that is required. This is why I wrote the book Single Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship. 

Though I may not be married for 10 years, I am looking forward to that,  the information shared in this book is a great start.

Have you ever met a potential Courter only to end up sabatoging the chance of getting to know him/her better?
 
What about insecurity? Did you ever turn a potential Courter away because you were insecure and felt the need to check up on his/her actions at all times?

Well behaviours or traits like these can definately hinder you from marrying your match.

After experiencing my very own "relationship collision" and seeing what caused me to remain in a eight year relationship that was not meant to be. I asked myself some serious questions which caused me to embark upon my very own journey towards becoming truly Single, Ready & Waiting. Five years later, I met the man of my dreams and we are living happily ever after.

In my book Single Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship I want to spare other singles the grief of going down the wrong road by understanding mindsets that could keep them from developing a meaningful relationship, how to handle the stages of Courtship and  much more.

It is a new perspective, I am your road guide.now it's up to you to.take the journey.
 
Visit: www.singlereadyandwaiting.com  for more information

In Christ,

Tanika A. Chambers
Founder & Author of Single Ready & Waiting

Who Doesn't Want to Build Their Confidence? - Here Are 10 Ways How

                        







Cast not therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward.  Hebrews 10:35


1. Dress Sharp
Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don’t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and shaving frequently, wearing clean clothes, and being cognizant of the latest styles.

This doesn’t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes. Buying less also helps reduce the clutter in your closet.

2. Walk Faster
One of the easiest ways to tell how a person feels about herself is to examine her walk. Is it slow? tired? painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.

3. Good Posture
Similarly, the way a person carries herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They aren’t enthusiastic about what they’re doing and they don’t consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You’ll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.

4. Personal Commercial
One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech. Unfortunately, opportunities to listen to a great speaker are few and far between. You can fill this need by creating a personal commercial. Write a 30-60 second speech that highlights your strengths and goals. Then recite it in front of the mirror aloud (or inside your head if you prefer) whenever you need a confidence boost.

5. Gratitude
When you focus too much on what you want, the mind creates reasons why you can’t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum. You’ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success.

6. Compliment other people
When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you’ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.

7. Sit in the front row
In schools, offices, and public assemblies around the world, people constantly strive to sit at the back of the room. Most people prefer the back because they’re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.

8. Speak up
During group discussions many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. This fear isn’t really justified. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.

9. Work out
Along the same lines as personal appearance, physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physcial appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive. Having the discipline to work out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.

10. Focus on contribution
Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus too much on ourselves and not enough on the needs of other people. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you’re making to the rest of the world, you won’t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase self confidence and allow you to contribute with maximum efficiency. The more you contribute to the world the more you’ll be rewarded with personal success and recognition.

Taken from: http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/10-ways-to-instantly-build-self-confidence/

My Interview with Orville Segree - What Is My Purpose?

This is one of the most powerful questions most of us ask ourselves at some point in life. What is it that I should do with my life? What is my purpose in life, my passion?

Well, for song artist/writer Orville Segree his day job was not it.

Bro. Orville thank you so much for taking the time out of your busy schedule to allow this interview.
Before we find out about your new single (pun intended) as in music single, let's find out a little bit more about you..


SRW: First things first, how long have you been married? Any Children?


Orville: Been married 25 years with 3 children.

SRW: What keeps a marriage like yours going as long as it has?

Orville: Marriage has been kept by the grace and mercy of God and knowing that i am not a quitter i must endeavour to be a role model for children .

SRW: What do you currently do for a living? Is this your passion/purpose in life?

Orville: For a living i am a medical professional with patient care and that is not my passion and purpose in life.

SRW: As you know the purpose for this interview is to talk about purpose...so now that we know your job isn't it, what is?

Orville: My purpose is to fulfill the mandate thru music which God
bless me with for the saving of souls to worship.

SRW: As a single were you aware of what your calling/passion/purpose was?

Orville: As a single person and even before I accepted Jesus I was already in the public eye singing. So I kept watering the gift of singing and now God is using me in this area to minister.

SRW: Did people take you seriously?

Orville: I was taken seriously because of the passion i exhibit
when I open my mouth to minister.


SRW: What differentiates a hobby form a purpose/passion?

Orville: Difference is you can have many hobbies that can be changed frequently, but purpose and passion is on a higher calling because it's from the heart of God and it drives you to succeed and stay in relationship with Him.




SRW: I had the opportunity of hearing some of your music the other day and I must say, your songs are beautifully written and song. What have you been up to since then?

Orville: Since the last time i've been praying, fasting, seeking and asking the Lord

for guidance in the right direction pertaining to the ministry that i know and

believe he's sending me in.

SRW: What advice can you give to those that know what their passionate/purpose/calling is but for some reason are holding back from starting?


Orville: Some individuals who knows what there passion, purpose and calling is may hold back because they feel overwhelmed,  fearful or doubtful. My advice is get  the right people to cover you with prayer, step out by faith and God will have your back.

SRW: Amen. I hear that. Well, thank you so much Orville for sharing I know you have lot's to do at your church this Easter Weekend so I won't keep you any longer. May God continue to use you in a mighty way. All the best to you, your family and your musical career.

If you would like to hear Orvilles latest track go here:

http://www.amazon.com/We-Worship-Jesus/dp/B007NX8CK2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1333476130&sr=8-1